Going through all the wonderful cards, one theme crops up again and again – Dad’s sense of humour. Dad liked to have a partner on the same wave length……..someone to be the of the part of a double act. He would quickly strike up a bond with his comedy partner, as we’ll see from the examples.
First up isn’t even a person, it was our pet dog, Sam. Supposed to be a family pet, Sam quickly decided that the only person in the pack that mattered was Dad. Where possible, he would be at Dad’s side at all times. When Dad got out of the car, if he couldn’t accompany Dad, he would slip into the driver’s seat. Dad would then reassure any passers-by that the dog had passed his test and had a driving licence. Meal times were interesting. Those of my generation and older will remember the dog on “That’s Life” who said “sausages”. Dad thought that Sam could do better than that. Just before each meal Dad would ask Sam “What do you say?”, and the dog would sort of say or woof “I want one”. He then got a treat. For us, this all seemed quite a normal mealtime experience. But for visiting friends, this was incredible, and years later they would say, “I remember your Dad and the talking dog”.
It was on holiday, particularly on the cruises, that Dad really went to town. Mum, Dad and others often struggled to spend generous on-board allowances, and this led to some humorous incidents. One involved his friend, Ernie. The matter of spending the money became both a challenge and a joke. Dad thought that he had it nailed one day, as he bought a large gold chain and bracelet, and paraded ostentatiously in front of Ernie. He showed off and preened, ensuring that Ernie knew that he was ahead. Ernie was soon on the war path. There was a show on that night, and the spotlight fell on Ernie. There he was resplendent in an even larger gold chain and bracelet. Dad knew that this was the point to concede in terms of male bling.
Dad’s sense of humour and comic rivalry was there until the end. He had some very special carers, and I really take my hat off to their dedication and commitment. They also knew that there could be laughter, even in the most difficult of times. I was bewildered when my Dad returned from a long stay at the hospice to have his first experience of care within the home. I rang Mum and she said, “I think that there is a party going on upstairs. The laughing is very loud.” Dad really excelled at getting a rapport with individuals. There was one instance when he was told that there was a league table of favourite patients. Can you imagine what he said when he found out that he was number two on this list! “What!!! Only number two!!!”
So, what would be Dad’s gift for you today? As a family, it was a no-brainer to pick this. He loved the TV programme the Detectorists. It’s a gentle comedy about two slightly oddball and complex guys, Lance and Andy. It’s their friendship, hopes and dreams, and their relationship with those around them, as they seek buried treasure with metal detectors. In Dad’s imagination he would have loved to be part of their world, sorting out the swedes and turnips with Lance, mowing the grass verges with Andy, sharing their jokes, and working out how to get one over on the rival detectorists. Their story kept Dad going in the good times and the bad, particularly as his health failed. He loved the music too. So the theme tune is Dad’s gift to us today. As we listen to this, remember what Barry brought to your life. He may have inspired you. He may have brought a smile to your face. As the tune plays, gather those thoughts and memories, and remember Barry with love, affection, and humour.
From Karan
Andrew
13th November 2018
The Lyrics for Detectorists (Original Soundtrack from the TV Series) by Johnny Flynn
Will you search through the lonely earth for me,
Climb through the biar and bramble.
I'll be your treasure.
I felt the touch of the kings and the breath of the wind,
I knew the call of all the song birds.
They sang all the wrong words.
I'm waiting for you,
I'm waiting for you.
(Mmmmmm)
Will you swim through the briny sea for me,
Roll along the ocean's floor.
I'll be your treasure.
I'm with the ghosts of the men who can never sing again,
There's a place follow me.
Where a love lost at sea.
Is waiting for you.
Is waiting for you.
Andrew
19th October 2018
Thank you for setting up this memorial to Barry.
We hope that you find it a positive experience developing the site and that it becomes a place of comfort and inspiration for you to visit whenever you want or need to.
Sent by J B Hall Funeral Directors on 11/10/2018